A Hellacious Belle’s Guide to the New South: Come to Jesus

“Come to Jesus” is another one of those Southern phrases, like “Bless Your Heart,” that has meaning beyond the obvious.

And yes, while a Southern pastor might admonish his congregation to “Come to Jesus,” its typical use is far from the gift of the grace of the Lord.

“You and me got to have a little ‘come to Jesus.'”

It’s something akin to being “taken to the woodshed.”

You and me having a “Come to Jesus” means that you are pretty much neck deep in poo, as I am completely over a situation you are involved in, (and most likely you as well,) and I am going to fix it (and possibly you) in one fell swoop.

A “Come to Jesus” is gonna call it on the carpet, call a spade a spade, and deal with it.

It will most likely clear the air and possibly right some wrongs.

Like as not, someone will be praying.

You just hope it isn’t you.

Bless your heart.