Share Your World – 2015 Week 8

This week’s questions from Cee’s weekly “Share Your World” blog prompt:

Your favorite blog post that you have written? (add link)

"We are Martial."

“We are Martial.”

There are two, and for very different reasons.  I think “We Are Martial” is the funny (to me at least), quippy kind of writing I wish I could do more of.

Missing Nkoyen” is a tribute to my best friend Nyk, who passed away five years ago.  It’s far from a worthy tribute to all that she was to so many of us, but it’s just one effort, as e.e. cumming, said, to carry her heart with me, “to carry it in my heart.”

What do you feel is the most enjoyable way to spend $500? Why?

A big dinner party at home or at a restaurant with a bunch of friends. Eating and drinking while spending time with people I love is one of my favorite things in the world to do.

We host dinner parties all the time, from our big Burn’s Supper in January, to St. Paddy’s Day dinners, Easter soirees, and 4th of July barbeques to food-themed movie nights, like “The Breakfast Club,” (with pancakes and bacon) and “Dr. No” (with Dark and Stormys and Key Crab Cakes.)

Burn's Supper

Burn’s Supper

If you could know the answer to any question, besides “What is the meaning of life?”, what would it be?

I think I would ask for direction on what my dream job would be and how I would go about getting it. I love designing events and creating images and stories for brands and social media. It would be amazing to write every day as part of my job. I wish I could combine them all and get a realistic paycheck.

Where do you eat breakfast?

When I’m with my husband, who usually cooks, we will eat in front of the fireplace in the winter, or on bar stools at the kitchen island. Otherwise, I might scarf down a bagel at my desk at work.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

For last week, I am grateful that it didn’t snow or ice over because I had so many events at work that would have been cancelled or negatively impacted. (Note: this is changing as we speak, as winter weather descends on us once again.  There are events that could still be cancelled or negatively impacted. Dammit.)

This week coming up?  See Question 2:  I am looking forward to a big brunch with friends on Sunday, followed by dinner with other friends visiting from out of town.  Yay!

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Six Things Thursday: February 5, 2015

I’ve got a ton of happy moments to be grateful for and share in Nerd in the Brain’s Three Things Thursday this week.  I’ll throw in a few extra to (hopefully) make up for being MIA last week.

Basically, two very fun weekends! Both wildly different but lots of wonderful memories.

Not a lot of time to blog. (Working on this.)

Reunited with my very dear friends, Sharona and Mike!

Reunited with my very dear friends, Sharona and Mike!

Friday the 23rd, we enjoyed some talented local art at my friend Denise’ opening at the Movement Gallery, and afterwards, visited Sharona and Michael, friends from my “glamorous” bartending past, running the bar at the quite excellent restaurant, Valenza. (Food and drinks were stellar!)

IMG_20150206_081632

Gracie: a lot of cat to love. And brush.

Saturday, we met up with my parents, who were in town visiting with some good friends of theirs in North Georgia. Besides great company and a wonderful dinner, we  were able to hang out with their really fabulous cat, Gracie, who used her advanced powers of feline mind control to bend me to her will.

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On Sunday, we helped out with Atlanta Lab Rescue’s Adoption Day.  One of my very favorites, the incredibly precious and beautiful Jake, found his forever home with a really sweet young couple.  Yay, Jake!  That’s a whole bunch of happy right there.

{Insert a manic work week}

Continuing the awesome on Friday the 31st, we gathered at the mountain house for our yearly celebration of Burn’s Supper.

Patti, my sister-cousin

Patti, my sister-cousin

This is David’s and my fifth year to host (our slightly warped version of) the traditional Scottish dinner and it gets bigger (and a little rowdier) each year.

Patti, my little Mommy and me

Patti, my little Mommy and me.  Oh, and a photo bomb from Dana.

We had a happily overflowing house with my parents, their friends Mike and Derenda (Gracie-the-cat’s folks), my sister-cousin Patti and her friend David, good friends, Heidi, Hil and Dana, and our bagpiper friend, Sam and his wife, for a soul-restoring weekend of beyond stellar views, company, food, wine and festivity.

The motley "MacCrew."

The motley “MacCrew.”

So, there you have it! My 6 things Thursday, or 3 Things Thursday², as it were.  Thank you, Nerd in the Brain, for the chance to remember (and share) my big ol’ bunch of happy!

(Soon to come, Tales from Burn’s Supper. Many, many stories in itself.)

three-things-thursday-spreading-happiness1

Feelin’ the Burns

So far this NaBloPoMo, I’ve managed to write a fresh post every day without resorting to a re-post of one of my old favorites. However, I noticed a fun-sounding  Post-a-Day yesterday when I was scrolling through the Reader and realized I had written something years ago that would respond beautifully to the challenge.  It brings up some great memories, too, so I thought I would share again.

“What’s the most elaborate, complicated meal you’ve ever cooked? Was it a triumph for the ages, or a colossal fiasco? Give us the behind-the-scenes story (pictures are welcome, of course).”

This is a story from 2011, right after my husband and I met, about a very special dinner.

The Last (Burn’s) Supper

Just in case you’ve missed the clues, I am a Ferguson. For the uninitiated, uninformed or uncaring, that means I’m of Scottish heritage, something my family is insanely proud of; after all, we are descendants of the first kings of Scotland. Our royal pedigree made absolute sense when I found out – I’ve always felt I was a princess, my tiara is simply implied.

Clann Ferguson Badge

Imagine my delight when my fabulous new boyfriend, David, turns out to be of Scottish ancestry as well–Clann Douglass, to be exact. Visions of bagpipes and Caber Tosses dancing in my head, I turned to him one January night and asked him the question burning so long and lonely in my soul:

“Would you host a Burns Supper with me?”

So for those uninitiated, uninformed or uncaring (and for you now joining them) Burns Supper is one of the major Scottish Holidays (along with Tartan Day, Hogmanay and St. Andrew’s Day) celebrated by Scots around the world. Specifically, it’s the commemoration of the life and works of famous Scottish poet, Robert Burns, who was born in 1759, and has been known as the “Bard of Scotland.” Burns is revered for his egalitarian beliefs (rare for those days) and his works, most notably poems such as “To a Mouse,” which inspired the Steinbeck novel Of Mice and Men; and “My Heart’s in the Highlands;” and the traditional New Year’s anthem, “Auld Lang Syne,” a classic to this day. Typically Burns Night, or simply “Burns Supper” is held on the anniversary of his birthday, January 25th, and is celebrated by eating the customary supper of haggis, neeps and tatties, reading his poems, singing his songs and downing shots of Scotch Whiskey to toast his “immortal memory.”

Since eating, drinking and being of Scottish descent come somewhat naturally to me, I had always aspired to host a Burns Supper, but in the past had found myself overwhelmed by the proscribed ritual: the entire night is shaped around a complicated timeline of speeches, toasts and songs a little beyond my American-born and raised sensibilities. I was also intimidated (read: flat out terrified) at the thought of creating the traditional menu, as it stars not only “Neeps and Tatties” (mashed turnips-bleck! and potatoes) but features the dread Haggis as centerpiece of the entire event. To be honest, for me, organ meat steamed in sheep intestine doesn’t exactly pique any desire to chow.

The Dread Haggis

The Dread Haggis

Ahh, but now! A partner in crime! Not only Scottish, but an excellent chef and delightfully (and possibly foolishly) excited to do things with me. Let the (Highland) games begin!

We decided to stage the event at David’s house, since he would be doing most of the cooking. If you’ve been following along with my blogging adventures, you know by now that I’m not only not much of a chef, but neither do I possess the culinary infrastructure required for major meal production. The guest list was easy: my dear friend (and fellow Scottish-American) Dana McPherson, who I knew was not only familiar with Burns Supper, but culinarily adventurous, free that evening and and in possession of a formal dress kilt with no apprehension to wearing.

Me and my bonnie laddie in our Scottish finery

The next step was to convert the menu to something that, in my opinion, was actually edible. Judicious internet research revealed, ta dumm!, that others share my aversion to turnips and tripe, and have created alternatives to the classic offal and root veg offering. Armed with a “Neo-Scottish” menu and a sheath of recipes, David took over in the kitchen, leaving me to figure out my wardrobe for the evening. David, despite limited mobility due to a broken leg (fodder for another blog post) had managed to acquire a last-minute formal dress kilt, but I was scrappin’ for anything fancy-n-Ferguson, finally donning a royal blue velvet Betsy Johnson slip dress with my Ferguson scarf jauntily knotted over one shoulder and afixed with our Clann kilt pin. Not nearly as fabulous as the boys, but would have to do.

Due to a spectacular and incendiary incident with a can of compressed air and a faulty furnace (yes, also most likely another blog post) Dana arrived late, a little crispy around the edges, but properly bandaged and bearing our evening’s libations. He was primed with pain meds, but David and I had taken the precaution of blunting our trepidacious tummies with the contents of a bottle of champagne (a Nicolas Feuillatte Cuvee Palmes d’Or 1996, a gift from Dana and a really incredible bottle of wine, btw.), so we were all three buzzily excited when we finally sat down around 10 p.m. for our official celebration.

David and Dana

The first order of business, according to Tradition, is to say a blessing, called the Selkirk Grace or the Kircudbright Grace, made famous by Burns who recited it for the Earl of Selkirk near Kircudbright.

Some hae meat and canna eat
And some wad eat that want it
But we hae meat and we can eat
And sae the Lord be thankit

Next up: the grand event! David, bless his heart, had not only undertaken cooking the entire dinner (hey, I did make the salad) but had also spent weeks learning the infamous Burns’ poem, “Address to a Haggis.” According to ritual, after the salad (or first course), the haggis is born in triumphantly (ahem) on a platter, accompanied by bagpipe music. The host then lauds the haggis with Burns’ immortal tribute.

Me and Dana

David may have cheated a little by having the poem pulled up his Blackberry
(ahh, modern technology) but executed it with such zeal and such an admirable brogue, that Dana and I were stunned into silence. (Well, to be honest, we were mostly stunned from two bottles of excellent Chardonnay, a 2002 Darioush Reserve, and if you listen to the video we took of the night, the “silence” part is also a little questionable.) Needless to say, we were pretty impressed.

Address to a Haggis
Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang’s my arm.
The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hudies like a distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o’ need,
While thro’ your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.
His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An’ cut ye up wi’ ready slight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like onie ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reeking, rich!
Then horn for horn, they stretch an’ strive:
Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,
Till a’ their weel-swall’d kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
‘Bethankit!’ hums.
Is there that owre his French ragout,
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad mak her spew
Wi perfect scunner,
Looks down wi’ sneering, scornfu’ view
On sic a dinner?

David’s Address to A Haggis

Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckless as a wither’d rash,
His spindle shank a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit;
Tho’ bluidy flood or field to dash,
O how unfit.
But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread,
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He’ll make it whistle;
An’ legs, an’ arms, an’ heads will sned
Like taps o’ thrissle.
Ye pow’rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o’ fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware,
That jaups in luggies;
But if ye wish her gratfu’ prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!

The poem ends with a dramatic (and somewhat violent) stabbing of the Haggis (I presume to let out the steam, but knowing what goes into traditional haggis, my thought is it probably originated as a precaution). I have to say, David did a spectacular job – the Neo-Haggis was really quite tasty and I went back for seconds of Neeps N Tatties!

We paired the entree with Dana’s contribution of a 2000 Darioush Reserve Cabernet –truly an exceptional wine (not that we were in any perceived danger of dehydration by then) which David broke up with shots of Johnny Walker Black Label Scotch for inspiration.

Enjoying an amazing meal

The evening’s framework cust0marily calls for more toasts and speeches, including a toast to Burns’ Immortal Memory and a “Toast to the Lassies” to which I had prepared the counter-toast, the “Reply to the Laddies,” (“Down with trousers! Up with kilts!”) but it was so late by the time we’d finished dinner that we decided to save them for next year. It was a truly lovely night, dare I say say intoxicating, in every way, with great companionship and wonderful food and wines. What a fun, fabulous and incredible ode to our heritage!

Now, on to Hogmanay!

“Weekend at Rabbie’s,” or Burn’s Supper (and Breakfast)

Last January, right around this time, David and I hosted our second annual Burn’s Supper, the traditional Scottish celebration of the life and works of the historic Bard of Scotland, Robert Burns.

That very next morning, we hosted our second Burn’s Breakfast, seeing as our guests from Burn’s Supper, as in the year prior, were still at the house when we woke up.

Yes, not only do I believe that a pattern is emerging, but I think I have identified the culprit.

In my post about our first supper, I spoke of the joy of finally finding a man who would host a Burn’s Night with me.

I had no idea then what I had gotten myself into.

David started planning Burns Supper 2012 most likely the morning after Burns Supper 2011, but adamantly and obsessively – oh,  around January 2nd of this past year.  While I limited myself to “do you think we could actually squeeze in more people ‘cuz wouldn’t it be fun to invite ______ too?” he was actually designing menu cards, fretting over tablescapes and mentally rearranging furniture.  To be honest, he did a spectacular job, but it brought into sharp contrast the extreme differences in our personalities.  I’m about the party – he’s about the parts.  Overall, it makes for a very successful combination and better him than me. 

422757_10150555946317561_1953976385_n

It’s probably a good idea, in actuality, to have someone putting brakes on me…I would have invited half my facebook friends, all the neighbors, everyone from work and probably an accidental Sasennach or two. As it was, we worked together to create an event just as memorable as the one before, for a select group of friends brave enough to attend.

Bill O’ Fare

Flush with our success from the first year’s event, when we conspired to create a truly tasty Neo-Haggis (read: no sheep entrails) and actually edible Neeps-n-Tatties (read: add booze) for our lone, intrepid guest; we scampered recklessly out a culinary limb and invited five people to to the 2012 dinner.

We became a little more adventurous menu-wise as well, upping the ante with an additional course, Cock-A-Leekie. Sounding more like a disease of the enlisted man, this soup is actually a traditional Celtic recipe; the first written records dating as far back as 1598.

I’ll share with you all, as it’s quite tasty, and an admirable addition to your chicken soup repertoire.

Cock-A-Leekie Soup, from the Food Network website:
Ingredients

  • 6 pitted prunes (David omitted the them in his version, but I’ll leave them in, since to not do so would be most irregular. Heh.)
    4 teaspoons Scotch
    One 3 1/2 pound chicken, cut into 8 pieces
    1 teaspoon kosher salt plus more to taste
    Freshly ground black pepper, to taste
    4 tablespoons unsalted butter
    6 medium leeks, (light green and white only), halved and cut into 1/2 inch slices
    10 sprigs flat- leaf parsley
    3 sprigs fresh thyme
    1 bay leaf
    5 cups homemade or canned low-sodium chicken broth

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Directions
In a small bowl combine the prunes with the Scotch and 2 tablespoons of water and set aside. Season the chicken with 1 teaspoon of the salt and the pepper. Place a large Dutch oven or soup pot over medium heat and melt half of the butter. Saute the chicken on each side until well browned, about 10 minutes. Transfer the chicken to a plate, and pour off any fat left in the pan. Add the remaining butter to the pan, saute the leeks over medium-low until tender, about 25 minutes.

Tie the parsley, thyme, and bay leaf with a string. Add the herb bundle, the chicken and the broth to the pot. Bring to a boil, and then lower the heat to maintain a gentle simmer. Cover and cook the soup for until the chicken is cooked through and tender, about 25 minutes. Remove the chicken, set aside to cool slightly. Remove the herb bundle and discard. Skim any fat from the surface of the soup with a spoon or ladle, if needed. Remove the chicken meat from the bones and cut into 1-inch chunks. Add the chicken cubes, the prunes, and their liquid to the soup. Season with salt and pepper. Simmer for 2 minutes. To serve divide the soup evenly among 6 warm soup bowls.

The ever-dapper Dana

The always dapper Dana

Food in the oven, cooking merrily along; table all set and David and I dolled up in our Highland best, we awaited our guests: the ever adventurous Dana and his companion, Troy; married friends and fellow foodies, the couple affectionately known as Tomkitten; and our buddy Hil, always up for cocktails and snacks.

David, who never ceases to amaze me, actually went to the trouble of setting up and taking a formal portrait for each couple as they arrived, sorta like Prom, but cooler and with more plaid (he actually printed the photos out, framed them, and gave them as party swag. My husband rocks.)

As always with our gatherings, we enjoyed a wonderful evening with such fantastic friends.  Everyone raved over the food and the wine and scotch flowed freely (yes, you might be sensing the pattern…) David gave another spectacular rendition of the “Address to a Haggis,” Dana provided an eloquent “Toast to the Lassies,” Troy treated us to an acapella song (he has an amazing voice), Tom provided an interpretive dance to “I Could Walk 500 Miles,” and I actually managed to complete my counter-salute to the gentlemen, the “Reply to the Toast to the Lassies.” Further more, upon my rousing invocation of “Down with trousers, up with kilts!” my husband flashed me.

That, lairds and ladies, is a successful dinner party.

Dana and Troy, workin' the tartan.

Dana and Troy, workin’ the tartan.

David's lovely dinner table

David’s lovely dinner table

Our handsome host, hard at work.

Our handsome host, hard at work.

Dana and Hil

Dana and Hil

Festivities about to commence!

Festivities about to commence!

The official KAVID Prom Burn’s Supper Portrait

Another year has passed and we will be celebrating Burns Supper again this weekend, our third year, which I find absolutely astounding. It’s becoming more of a Scottish-American version of Thanksgiving to me, as I reflect on last year’s event and look forward to the upcoming. I try to count my uncountable blessings: my joyous new marriage, the addition of my parents joining us for dinner this year, and David’s parents “skyping” in; a reprise of almost all of last year’s guests and even more good friends joining the mix for the first time. I am rich indeed, and most grateful for the happiness in my life.

I leave you with some fitting words from the birthday boy himself, and promise to recap our upcoming adventure a little faster this time!

Then catch the moments as they fly,
And use them as ye ought, man:
Believe me, happiness is shy,
And comes not aye when sought, man

The Last (Burns) Supper

Just in case you’ve missed the clues, I am a Ferguson. For the uninitiated, uninformed or uncaring, that means I’m of Scottish heritage, something my family is insanely proud of; after all, we are descendants of the first kings of Scotland. Of course, our royal pedigree made absolute sense when I found out – I’ve always felt I was a princess, my tiara must simply be implied.

Clann Ferguson Badge

Imagine my delight when my fabulous new boyfriend, David, turns out to be of Scottish ancestry as well–Clann Douglas, to be exact.  Visions of bagpipes and Caber Tosses dancing in my head, I turned to him one January night and asked him the question burning so long and lonely in my soul:

“Would you host a Burns Supper with me?”

So for those uninitiated, uninformed or uncaring (and for you now joining them) Burns Supper is one of the major Scottish Holidays (along with Tartan Day, Hogmanay and St. Andrew’s Day) celebrated by Scots around the world. Specifically, it’s the commemoration of the life and works of famous Scotish poet, Robert Burns, who was born in 1759, and has been known as the “Bard of Scotland.” Burns is revered for his egalitarian beliefs (rare for those days) and his works, most notably poems such as “To a Mouse,” which inspired the Steinbeck novel Of Mice and Men; and “My Heart’s in the Highlands;” and the traditional New Year’s anthem, “Auld Lang Syne,” a classic to this day. Typically Burns Supper, or simply “Burns Night” is held on the anniversary of his birthday, January 25th, and is celebrated by eating the customary supper of haggis, neeps and tatties, reading his poems, singing his songs and downing shots of Scotch Whiskey to toast his “immortal memory.”

Since eating, drinking and being Scottish come somewhat naturally to me, I had always aspired to host a Burns Supper, but in the past had found myself overwhelmed by the proscribed ritual: the entire night is shaped around a complicated timeline of speeches, toasts and songs a little beyond my American-born and raised sensibilities. I was also intimidated (read: flat out terrified) at the thought of creating the traditional menu, as it stars not only “Neeps and Tatties” (mashed turnips-bleck! and potatoes) but features the dread Haggis as centerpiece of the entire event. To be honest, for me, organ meat steamed in sheep intestine doesn’t exactly pique any desire to chow.

The Dread Haggis

The Dread Haggis

Ahh, but now! A partner in crime! Not only Scottish, but an excellent chef and delightfully (and possibly foolishly) excited to do things with me. Let the (Highland) games begin!

We decided to stage the event at David’s house, since he would be doing most of the cooking. If you’ve been following along with my blogging adventures, you know by now that I’m not only not much of a chef, but neither do I possess the culinary infrastructure required for major meal production. The guest list was easy: my dear friend (and fellow Scottish-American) Dana McPherson, who I knew was not only familiar with Burns Supper, but culinarily adventurous, free that evening and and in possession of a formal dress kilt with no apprehension in wearing.

Me and my bonnie laddie in our Scottish finery

The next step was to convert the menu to something that, in my opinion, was actually edible. Judicious internet research revealed, ta dumm!, that others share my aversion to turnips and tripe, and have created alternatives to the classic offal and root veg offering. Armed with a “Neo-Scottish” menu and a sheath of recipes, David took over in the kitchen, leaving me to figure out my wardrobe for the evening. David, despite limited mobility due to a broken leg (fodder for another blog post) had managed to acquire a last-minute formal dress kilt, but I was scrappin’ for anything fancy-n-Ferguson, finally donning a royal blue velvet Betsy Johnson slip dress with my Ferguson scarf jauntily knotted over one shoulder and afixed with our Clann kilt pin. Not nearly as fabulous as the boys, but would have to do.

Due to a spectacular and incendiary incident with a can of compressed air and a faulty furnace (yes, also most likely another blog post) Dana arrived late, a little crispy around the edges, but properly bandaged and bearing our evening’s libations. He was primed with pain meds, but David and I had taken the precaution of blunting our trepidacious tummies with the contents of a bottle of champagne (a Nicolas Feuillatte Cuvee Palmes d’Or 1996, a gift from Dana and a really incredible bottle of wine, btw.), so we were all three buzzily excited when we finally sat down around 10 p.m. for our official celebration.

David and Dana

The first order of business, according to Tradition, is to say a blessing, called the Selkirk Grace or the Kircudbright Grace, made famous by Burns who recited it for the Earl of Selkirk near Kircudbright.

Some hae meat and canna eat
And some wad eat that want it
But we hae meat and we can eat
And sae the Lord be thankit

Next up: the grand event! David, bless his heart, had not only undertaken cooking the entire dinner (hey, I did make the salad) but had also spent weeks learning the infamous Burns’ poem, “Address to a Haggis.” According to ritual, after the salad (or first course), the haggis is born in triumphantly (ahem) on a platter, accompanied by bagpipe music. The host then lauds the haggis with Burns’ immortal tribute.

Me and Dana

David may have cheated a little by having the poem pulled up his Blackberry
(ahh, modern technology) but executed it with such zeal and such an admirable brogue, that Dana and I were stunned into silence. (Well, to be honest, we were mostly stunned from two bottles of excellent Chardonnay, a 2002 Darioush Reserve, and if you listen to the video we took of the night, the “silence” part is also a little questionable.) Needless to say, we were pretty impressed.

Address to a Haggis
Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang’s my arm.
The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hudies like a distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o’ need,
While thro’ your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.
His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An’ cut ye up wi’ ready slight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like onie ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reeking, rich!
Then horn for horn, they stretch an’ strive:
Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,
Till a’ their weel-swall’d kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
‘Bethankit!’ hums.
Is there that owre his French ragout,
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad mak her spew
Wi perfect scunner,
Looks down wi’ sneering, scornfu’ view
On sic a dinner?

David's Address to A Haggis


Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckless as a wither’d rash,
His spindle shank a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit;
Tho’ bluidy flood or field to dash,
O how unfit.
But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread,
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He’ll make it whistle;
An’ legs, an’ arms, an’ heads will sned
Like taps o’ thrissle.
Ye pow’rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o’ fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware,
That jaups in luggies;
But if ye wish her gratfu’ prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!

The poem ends with a dramatic (and somewhat violent) stabbing of the Haggis (I presume to let out the steam, but knowing what goes into traditional haggis, my thought is it probably originated as a precaution). I have to say, David did a spectacular job – the Neo-Haggis was really quite tasty and I went back for seconds of Neeps N Tatties!

Neo-Haggis

  • 2 lbs. liver (almost any kind)
  • 3 onions
  • 1/4 lb beef suet
  • 2 cups oatmeal
  • Black pepper
  • Salt
  • Dash of Cayenne Pepper or Tabasco Sauce
  • 2 cups stock or broth
  1. Cook 2 pounds of liver with peeled onions for about 20 minutes
  2. Put the liver and onion through a chopper
  3. Chop suet
  4. Put oatmeal into a heavy frying pan and stir over fire until lightly toasted
  5. Add chopped liver, onions and suet
  6. Season to taste with salt and freshly ground black pepper
  7. Add few grains of cayenne pepper or couple of drops of Tabasco as desired
  8. Moisten with liquid in which liver and onions were cooked
  9. Put into a large heat-proof buttered bowl, filling a little more than half full
  10. Cover with greased paper, waxed paper or buttered aluminum foil
  11. Tie or press down foil securely
  12. Steam for about two hours or cook in pressure cooker under 15 pounds pressure for about 30 minutes

Serves eight (editor’s note: if you can find eight people brave enough to try it).

Nuevo Neeps and Tatties

  • 1 Haggis
  • 1/2 Swede (Turnip, if you’re Scottish. But then you’ll probably know far better than me how this should be done).
  • 2 Potatoes (good mashing potatoes such as King Edwards or Maris Piper)
  • 50 ml Scotch Whiskey
  • 50 ml Double Cream
  • 1 tbsp Honey
  • Salt & Pepper to season
  1. Peel swede and potatoes and bring to the boil in a pan of salted water until softened
  2. Separate and mash separately – add butter and milk for the right consistency.
  3. Cook haggis according to recipe instructions before mashing up with a fork.
  4. Spoon the mixture into a ramekin – potato followed by swede then finally haggis, in roughly equal layers.
  5. Meanwhile reduce the whiskey in a pan by about half. Add the cream and honey, stir well and bubble until thick and syrupy. Add a good dose of pepper and a little salt, then drizzle over the haggis.

We paired the entree with Dana’s contribution of a 2000 Darioush Reserve Cabernet –truly an exceptional wine (not that we were in any perceived danger of dehydration by then) which David broke up with shots of Johnny Walker Black Label Scotch for inspiration.

Enjoying an amazing meal

The evening’s framework custimarily calls for more toasts and speeches, including a toast to Burns Immortal Memory and a “Toast to the Lassies” to which I had prepared the counter-toast, the “Reply to the Laddies,” (“Down with trousers! Up with kilts!”) but it was so late by the time we’d finished dinner that we decided to save them for next year. It was a truly lovely night, dare I say say intoxicating, in every way, with great companionship and wonderful food and wines. What a fun, fabulous and incredible ode to our heritage!

Now, on to Hogmanay!